WANTED:
RICH BOYFRIEND
Must
enjoy Rick Springfield
music and be
willing to see
him in concert
multiple times.
Frequent flier
miles and travel
perks a plus.
Would prefer
childless, but
if you do have
kids, don't
expect
me to be around
for any of the
important events.
Potential boyfriends
be aware that
holidays and
anniversaries
will come second
to my Rick Springfield
adventures. Marriage
an option, but
be prepared with
a ring that can
be put aside
as collateral
for loans towards a
new camera or
an
airline tickets.
Also willing
to have sex,
but only immediately
after my Rick
Springfield trips
when I'm still
in the mood.
DESPERATE! WILLING
TO PAY NEARLY ANYTHING!
Must have seeds to the money trees that so many Rick Springfield fans clearly have growing in their backyards. Also would like gardening manual to help these trees grow quickly and multiply into forest immediately. Is no fun being a fan without some serious coin and watching those who have it get all the goodies. There must be a reason why their pockets never empty, so please...help a girl out! Let me in on the secret! SEND ME THE SEEDS!
WANTED: PERSONAL TRAINER
Looking for personal trainer with specialization in short sprint training. Must have training in track and field events such as sprints, high jump, stamina. Has to be able to work miracles quickly; need to be in shape to do the GA runs this summer on tour with RS.
Call 999-555-1FAN. Only serious offers please.
FOR SALE: ZOOM
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